Similar to old pennies, environmental toxins are ubiquitous, harmful if swallowed, and may contain trace amounts of Abraham Lincoln. Cleanse from the inside out with today's Groupon to Dr. Zhous Acupuncture and Pain Management Clinic. Choose from the following options:
• For $45, you get a one-hour myofascial massage and essential oil raindrop aromatherapy (a $90 value) and a dietary/nutritional and lifestyle consultation (a $30 value; a $120 total value).
• For $85, you get a holistic body-mind acupuncture package, which includes a clinical Chinese assessment and orthopedic examination (a $30 value), a dietary/nutritional and lifestyle consultation (a $30 value), an acupuncture treatment (an $85 value), a cupping/body detox and myofascial pain release (a $30 value), and an acupressure massage (a $30 value; a $205 total value).
• For $120, you get three one-hour myofascial massages and three essential oil raindrop aromatherapy sessions (a $270 value) and a dietary/nutritional and lifestyle consultation (a $30 value; a $300 total value).
A chief physician at HeiLongJiang Medical University and a guest lecturer at UWMadison, Dr. Xiping Zhou established his acupuncture, pain management, and natural wellness clinic to treat a variety of illnesses and afflictions, including sports injuries and infertility, with conventional medicine and traditional Chinese medicine. All sessions begin with a dietary/nutritional and lifestyle consultation with Dr. Zhou, after which he employs myofascial massage and knock-knock jokes to relax facial tissue and loosen up muscle knots, stretching and compressing sinews with deep specialized strokes that release tension and circulate blood and oxygen. The raindrop aromatherapy sessions work to balance the nervous and hormonal systems, using rosemary for its stimulating essences, lavender for its sedative qualities, castor for its speedway cred, and other extracted or distilled essential oils.
Pamper corporeal and mental chambers with a 60- to 90-minute holistic body-mind acupuncture package, which adds detoxifying cupping treatments, an energy-balancing acupressure massage, and a clinical Chinese assessment to the myofascial massage. At the session's core is the acupuncture treatment, during which Dr. Zhou guides thin needles into specific areas of the body to balance energy and release captive dolphins and hormones like endorphins and serotonin.
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