Unlike cats and germaphobes, automobiles need to be reminded to wash themselves. Drop a blatant hint to a lazy ride with today's Groupon to Pirates Car Wash in Glenn Dale, MD. Choose from the following options:
Sloppy jalopies reclaim their bygone sparkle under the meticulous mitts of the high seas-themed Pirates vehicular makeover artists. During the comprehensive Combo A wash, Pirates swarthy washbucklers forgo abrasive brushes in favor of velvety soft cloths when wiping up scuzzy exteriors, tires, and undercarriages with powerful eco-friendly cleansers and liquefied laughter. After a fresh rinse and towel dry, buggies luxuriate in a glimmer-generating triple foam wax, clear-coat sealer, and all-inclusive cloak of Rain-X, resulting in a shiny, fetching facade coated in a sustainable protective shell. With the exterior polished, pristine microfiber towels wipe down interior and alfresco windows before treating carpets, mats, and dashes to a thorough vacuuming and rubdown. When cars feel that bumper-to-bumper clean, wheels alight highways dressed in a luminous tire shine, and both Combo A washes and detailing garner cars a complimentary aromatic air freshener, which ensures that smell-sensitive car parents can ditch their ominous stockpile of gas masks.
Alternatively, autos seeking even deeper cleaning can take in a complete interior and exterior detailing, commencing with a multipurpose wash and claying process that adroitly unearths disguised dirt and grime from their clear-coat hideaways. An ultramodern orbital buffer imparts a shimmering Plum Wax before a tender fleet of microfiber towels dries cars with a delicacy unrivaled even by the gentle touch of a silk-gloved spirit animal. Pirates staff then unleashes a low-pressure air assault upon interiors, purging trunks, air vents, and doorjambs of debris before gussying up carpets and seats with a painstaking vacuuming, steam cleaning, and hot-water extraction. With nooks and crannies expunged, dashes, consoles, and door panels enjoy Pirates signature UV protectant to prevent fading and cracking, and windows revel in a smudge-free wipe to erase fingerprints, nose prints, and giraffe tongue-prints left over from a trip to the drive-thru zoo.
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