Linguists have concluded that only one three-word combination in the English language guarantees promotions at work, scores instant green lights from Hollywood, and transforms junkyard cars into jet-fueled schooners: Pirates. With. Lasers. And with today's Groupon, you get to be that pirate: for $7, you get two games of laser tag at Scallywag Tag (a $13 value). This Groupon is good at both its West Side and East Side locations.
Buckle into the transformative vests and prepare to be transported into another dimension as Scallywag's arena catapults you into a neon-colored 18th-century world of black-lit pirate ships and Caribbean villages outfitted with wide-screen LCD scoreboards, armed only with a high-tech laser and whatever nautical death puns you devised on the drive over. Pretend your closest friends are your earnest enemies and precisely shiver their timbers with a high-powered pulse of light straight to the chest. Two games are a sufficient amount of laser-taggery to work out lingering work stress or build up a thick, protective shell of happiness. The fun continues even while you patiently wait outside the laserdome for your turn to light up the arena, because you can view the current battle and size up future adversaries on Scallywag Tag's projection-driven computer monitors.
Laser tag is a wondrous way to live out video-game hero dreams, to work out tensions with your roommate, or to live out your fantasy of starting a ragtag militia of rogue pirates with Mark from accounting. Buy extras as gifts and invite along Imperial Stormtrooper friends and their remarkably poor marksmanship to a few friendly rounds at Scallywag Tag.
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